Jor-Minta Community Excited Over Newest Neighbor

By Nita Keswick, Quilt staff

DATELINE: ARMINTA STREET

There’s an exciting new arrival on Arminta near Jordan — and it really is something to “crow” about!

Meet “Heisenberg” — the lively pet rooster of Canoga Park resident Radek Murta. 

“F_ckeen...my cousin?  He in County til November...? So he give him to me before he had to go an’ shit. He called him ‘Spongebob.’ F_ckeen stupid name. I changed it to ‘Heisenberg’ because this rooster, he’s f_ckeen bad-ass, you know?”

It certainly seems Heisenberg knows — and agrees, as the spritely bird begins squawking and fluttering aggressively towards the Canoga Park Quilt photographer who wandered too close to an upcycled car tire laying in the middle of the dirt yard. 

Radek Murta (left) and pet "Heisenberg" (right). The rambunctious rooster's already a celeb-
rity in the tight-knit Jor-Minta neighborhood, with residents near and far waking to his signa-
ture kukarekú each morning, heralding the last few hours before dawn breaks.  Staff photos.

“You got to stay back, bro. F_ckeen he has his food in that tire an’ shit,” Murta explains, adding that perhaps it was the photog’s proximity to the rooster’s “bitches”  — as the young man calls the six hens that share the dirt yard in front of the cozy two-bedroom, mid-century home — that caused the brief uproar.

“Heisenberg, calm the f_ck down!” the 19-year old father of three admonishes his feathered friend as he gulps the last of a Monster energy drink and wings the empty can at him - which the pugnacious poult leaps to avoid but then surprisingly settles into a murmur of low clucking. Radek erupts in a staccato of laughter.

Jarik Murta, currently recover-
ing from his injuries. Staff photo.

“Ha ha ha ha! F_ckeen...he already knows his name and shit, yo! My little brother, Jarik — f_ckeen was playing with a tennis ball and it bounced behind the water pail over there...? He goes to get it and Heisenberg f_cked him up bad. Both legs and one arm all f_ckeen tore up an' shit.  Ha ha ha ha!  F_ckeen, he had to go to Urgent Care an’ shit. Dumbass! I told him to stay away an’ shit, you know? Heisenberg, he’s bad-ass. F_ckeen, look at those spurs, bro. That shit is f_cked-up!”

A neighbor negotiating the sidewalk with a walker ambles by and calls out to Murta.

“Hey, young man, this has to stop! That rooster wakes up the entire neighborhood at quarter to four every morning!”

“Ha ha ha ha!  I know, he’s f_ckeen like a alarm clock an’ shit! Heisenberg, he’s f_ckeen bad-ass!”

Unidentified Arminta Street resident
credits the rooster for its consistency,
precision and punctuality. Staff photo.

“No one around here can sleep anymore. Every morning, not even four a.m. and it starts," continues the elderly gent who then turns and addresses your Quilt reporter, looking for a sympathetic ear. "I’ve talked to ten people in the neighborhood — we’re going crazy! And even someone from as far away Runnymede was by here yesterday asking where the noise is coming from. We don’t know what to do. It’s every morning! I’m retired but a lot of these people have to get up to go to work. This shouldn’t be allowed!”

Having said his piece, however, he doesn’t press the issue and continues on his way, seemingly defeated. Murta, glowering darkly, watches him go.

“F_ckeen old man. Heisenberg’s a f_ckeen rooster an’ shit. That’s what he does, yo,” the fiercely protective pet owner grumbles. “F_ck the neighbors!”

It certainly seems that here on Arminta Street, newest resident Heisenberg is already cock-of-the-walk!