Monday, March 21, 2016

Mysterious ‘Pavement Circles’ Appearing In Canoga Park Area

By Burton Cantara, Quilt staff. With additional reporting by Charlotte Rudnick.

Unexplained dark circular patterns have been appearing on streets and parking lots in Canoga Park and surrounding areas, according to local residents.  The mysterious circles, which range in diameter roughly from eight to twenty-five feet, were considered a rare anomaly until recently, and have begun materializing with increasing frequency in the West Valley over the past few months.
Mysterious pavement circles at Sherman Way and Farralone. Photo courtesy of Merl Zygmont.
“Yeah, these here just appeared overnight,” says Merl Zygmont of Nita Avenue, pointing to a series of overlapping circles at the intersection of Sherman Way and Farralone Avenue in Canoga Park’s tightly-knit Shermalone district. “I know they weren’t there on Saturday afternoon when I was coming home from 7-11 after buying my lottery ticket.  

“But on Sunday morning, when I was heading back over to 7-11 to check my lottery ticket, there they were, large as life. It’s kind of spooky.”

One of the largest known 'pavement circles' recorded appeared in the parking lot of the Westridge
Plaza on Roscoe Boulevard, leaving some Sam Ash customers so shaken up they headed to one
of those storefronts with a green cross which seems to have a calming effect for some. Staff photo.
“We’re aware [of the circles],” says Capt. Reed Malloy, Cyber Support Bureau Officer of the West Valley Bureau of Road-Based Unexplained Phenomenon. “We’ve had a number of calls about them. We’re looking into it. That’s all I can say at this time.”
A large, multi-ringed pattern on DeSoto Avenue on the Winnetka border. Staff photo.
An insider with the LAPD who spoke on the condition of anonymity says the department is stymied and doesn’t have answers. “Yeah, every time I’m at Topanga Station refilling the snack machine, I overhear them saying stuff like, ‘Did you see that big one up on Nordhoff?! Holy shit!’ and stuff like that.”

Dr. Morris Detzer
Photo: Mimi Detzer
However, an expert in metanatural superterrestrial extradimensional paraphysics, Dr. Morris Detzer, thinks the explanation may be literally “out of this world.”

“When the science community doesn’t have a ready answer, you look beyond known science,” Detzer explains. “We’ve got a few hypotheses about the circles and they all point in one direction — up. 

“Clearly they’re left by flying saucers from outer space.”

Recent calls to the “Open Lines” segment of popular late night radio program Coast to Coast with George Noory indicate Detzer's theory is already shared by others and gaining traction. 
The rings have even appeared in "exclusive" West Hills, here at Platt & Ingomar. Staff photo.
“Those circles — they’re the work of UFOs. It’s them grays, I know it,” insisted one caller who identified herself as “Berta from near Lanark Park.” She continued that “it all ties in with Obama being the goddamn antichrist” and then added something about Del Taco’s attempts to up-sell customers to a larger sized meal before becoming completely incoherent, forcing Noory to dump the call and quickly launch into an impromptu C. Crane radio spot.

Closeup of one of Canoga Park's baffling 'pavement circles' with detail showing a distinct dis-
coloration to the street.   Thin, parallel striations of unaffected roadway within the darker area
run the circle's entire circumference, further perplexing experts as to their purpose. Staff photo.
At his office on campus at Pierce College Winnetka, Dr. Detzer discusses another, equally mystifying aspect of the circles:  The strange properties the area inside the pavement rings exhibit.

"Nothing grows there. Not a blade of grass, not the tiniest weed, nothing. These circles are completely barren of plant life. It's uncanny," says the noted professor of crypto-asphaltology.

And the fact that no one has come forward saying they’ve witnessed the creation of any of the so-called “pavement circles” firsthand further lends credence to his extraterrestrial theory, Dr. Detzer says.
A near-perfect circle at Jordan and Valerio. Could its materialization at this intersection, with places of
worship on two of the corners, have some spiritual and benevolent significance? Or does its proximity
to the Canoga Park Women's Club point to something much more sinister and horrifying?    Staff photo.
“Actually, who we’re hearing from are earwitnesses to the eyewitnesses,” the professor continues. “Let me explain: I’ve had dozens of calls from people who report hearing automotive tires loudly screeching in the exact locations these circles are noticed the following morning.
This pavement circle, observed in Chatsworth on Canoga Avenue was graded 8.5 on the Balyan scale, a
gauge used to determine size, circularity, intensity and other criteria of the mysterious rings. Staff photo.
“Obviously, cars and motorcycles are driving along late at night and come upon one of these spaceships in the act of making the circles, the drivers are of course petrified and slam on the brakes — and then get out of there. The fact that none of these witnesses have reached out to anyone is significant. It's safe to presume the Government has already gotten to these people to warn them to keep quiet about what they saw," Detzer says gravely. 

"I don’t know what this is all about, but believe me, it’s big. Big.”
Multiple, overlapping pavement circles are visible in a Canoga Park shopping center. Staff photo.
“I’d like to discuss this further," says Detzer, looking at his watch, "but sadly, I have to go to the funeral of one of my students who was run down while crossing the road by someone doing something called ‘a donut.’ Just tragic.

“Sure wish the police could do something about those street racers, but I realize they've got their hands full with this UFO thing.”

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